Star Tripped
Word Count (projected/actual so far):
85,000
Genre:
YA Science fiction
How long have you been working on it?
Eighteen months: I started it for NaNoWriMo 2011, and it's been through two drafts and input from several critique partners and one beta reader, though I'd like some more beta readers. The initial idea came to me when I was about 14 years old so this story brewed in my head for decades!
Elevator Pitch:
I usually love writing pitches, but for some reason I've really struggled with a pitch for this particular book. This is my most recent of dozens of lame attempts:
Blinded in a freak accident, Camria is tempted by a mysterious young man's offer to restore her sight in exchange for her memories, which she discovers are not her own but belong to another girl who lives light-years away.Brief Synopsis:
Seventeen-year-old Camria and her twin sister Liz are the first children ever conceived and born on the International Space Station. Cam just wants to be a normal high school junior and skip all the attention that goes with being a highly publicized “space twin.” But when she’s blinded in a freak explosion, and Liz disappears, she’ll do anything to get her sister and her sight back.
Cam suspects there’s something more to Lander, a new transfer student, than his odd accent and his interest in her. He's from a planet not yet discovered by Earth, and he knows why Liz disappeared. Lander needs the memories hidden in Cam's mind during the supposed explosion to save Liz from an alien faction bent on taking over minds of unsuspecting humans.
Lander restores Cam's sight with his advanced technology and takes her to find her sister, but whoa. She didn't count on traveling through wormholes, fighting off mind control, and facing her own growing attraction to Lander. Cam must decide to save her sister and herself, or risk their lives to keep the enemy faction from stealing more minds from Earth.
Are you looking for Beta Reader(s)?
Yes - leave a comment if interested! Leave a comment even if you aren't interested, I'd still love to check out your WIP too.
Here's a picture that inspired part of my story: image of the Orion Nebula.
Posts
Great pitch!! All the best with this Margo!! It's a strong story - love that it's been with you a while and it's maturing nicely! Yay! Take care
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This sounds like a riveting tale!! Best of luck with it!! :)
ReplyDeleteThis book really sounds interesting, and I like Lander already - I think it's his name...reminds me of Sat Wars
ReplyDeleteThis sounds awesome, Margo! I have ideas that were conceived when I was a young teen, too, that I'm sure I'll write. C.S. Lewis got the idea for The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe when he was 16, but he didn't write it until he was 40. And look where that took him! I expect good things for you with this novel!! :)
ReplyDeleteHappy reading and writing! from Laura Marcella @ Wavy Lines
Margo, this sounds awesome!!! I want to hear more about this space twin. Have you queried this yet? I think that elevator pitch would look just smashing as a paragraph in your letter :)
ReplyDeleteMargo, this sounds like such a cool concept! I can see an agent/editor snapping this up.
ReplyDeleteWow, this sounds fantastic! I'm a sucker for YA sci-fi. I would love to beta read for you if you need!
ReplyDeleteAwesome. Hey lady, I'd love to beta for you--when my schedule clears up in a couple months. That is, if you're still looking for betas in August. :)
ReplyDeleteWhoa, that is a cool picture. Your book sounds interesting!
ReplyDeleteWell, the pitch definitely grabbed me! I'd love to beta read for you. I'm interested in anything to do with memories and mind control.
ReplyDeleteThe pitch definitely pulled me in. :) Good luck with this project, it's hard when something has been a dream for so long!
ReplyDeleteSounds like a great read! Sci-fi isn't usually my thing, but I'd love to beta this for you.
ReplyDeleteReally cool idea. I am so impress with people who can build worlds and then can lay a cool story on top of them.
ReplyDeleteThis sounds fascinating. I love the idea of being the first kids born in space.
ReplyDeleteI love space stories! I love the idea, too. You did great with the pitch and the synopsis.
ReplyDeleteThis sounds really interesting. And I love the picture, can see how it'd be an inspiration.
ReplyDeleteSounds awesome!
ReplyDeleteTim
The Other Side blog.
Wow, loving the sound of this. It has such an intriguing premise! And the idea for this has been in your head since you were 14? Whoa! Gotta love a project that refuses to fade away. ;)
ReplyDeleteAh, this sounded familiar, and now I know why. You had a query at Matt McNish's QQQE a while back, right? Good luck with it!
ReplyDeleteUm love this concept!!!! Would love to Beta read this one ;)
ReplyDeleteThe premise in the pitch sounds great, i think the wording might not be quite there yet. Cool idea though.
ReplyDeletemood
Moody Writing
I liked the elevator pitch. Interesting idea for a book.
ReplyDeleteNo, it's surely not! I'm on revision #8, and I'm sure I'll have many more before I finally try querying. I'm at the point where I've picked at the words so much I think I'm only making it worse. When I reach that point I find I'm better off deleting sentences or even paragraphs and trying a different tack.
ReplyDeleteWoo hoo!!! THank you!
ReplyDeleteYup, I got some great suggestions from Matt's critique and others, I tried working in some, but it still has some issues!
ReplyDeleteIt's almost too dear to my heart because of the many years!
ReplyDeleteBut I know a writing professional doesn't get bogged down with just one story. I have others in the works...
ReplyDeleteGlad you mentioned the picture!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
ReplyDeleteI thought it was a cool sci fiction idea that actually had some plausibility to it! Thank you
ReplyDeleteThank you!!! Yay!
ReplyDeleteSo glad you are still interested!
ReplyDeleteIsn't it an amazing picture?? Thanks for mentioning it!
ReplyDeleteMemories and mind control have always fascinated me too. Obviously! (grin) Thank you for your offer! I will contact you.
ReplyDeleteYes I'm pretty attached to it, but fortunately I have other "babies" too!
ReplyDeleteSweet. Double sweet. I'll contact you!
ReplyDeleteHappy dance! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the suggestion. No I haven't queried yet, on the hunt for beta readers first. Glad you liked the pitch, it's been a thorn in my side for a while, but this version is growing on me.
ReplyDeleteI am a long time fan of Lewis' and my goal is to read all of his 30+ books (I'm over halfway there) but I didn't know this about him! Thanks for sharing - hugely inspiring.
ReplyDeleteYou're the first person to mention anything about his name. Thank you! I'm a bit fond of it myself, and if it makes you think of Star Wars, that makes me incredibly happy!
ReplyDeleteI remember your query at TQQQE! I loved your premise then and still do. I really hope you get this book out and published because no doubt, this is going to be a success.
ReplyDeleteI love the sound of your story - space is definitely one of my favourite settings to read within!
ReplyDeleteLove the title! I must have missed your query at TQQQE - will go look!
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