Analyzing The Magic Thief, by Sarah Prineas

Switching back to an example of a middle grade novel, after tackling a few young adult novels. (My next sample will be a new genre for me: steampunk. Soulless, by Gail Carriger).

A synopsis of the Magic Thief can be found in its first four sentences:

A thief is a lot like a wizard. I have quick hands. And I can make things disappear. But then I stole a wizard's locus magicalus and nearly disappeared myself forever.

A great beginning and I'm envious because in exactly 31 words we get a plot, two characters, a hint of voice, and we're hooked.

The book is written in first person point-of-view, which is difficult to carry throughout an entire novel because it takes some real engineering to fill the reader in on all the necessary information that the first person narrator isn't privy to. The author circumvents this problem by starting each chapter with notes from the wizard's journal. So we get to see another character's point-of-view and voice and that helps this novel considerably by adding variety.

The ending had a really, REALLY, cool surprise. Here's a just a little bit to tempt you:

"Here _______," I whispered again. Within the tank, the ________ stilled, shifted, and focused itself on my locus magicalus, on me. It was like looking up at a night sky full of stars and having the stars suddenly look back.

Isn't that cool? There are snippets of similar magical writing throughout the book. I admit I've been harsh on this book, but it is still worth the read.

Just for fun, try to fill in the blanks in the quote above. What do you think it is?

P.S. Each entry in the wizard's journal includes some runes and at the end of the book you get the key to interpreting the runes, so this is an extra little bonus/game for kids. The second book in the series is available now, too.

P.P.S. I read several of Sarah Prineas' short stories on the Online Writing Workshop for SF & Fantasy at least ten years ago before she was published. Proof that getting your work out in workshops & on the web really does work. I might not have picked up this book to read it if the author's name hadn't rang a bell.

Setting can be more than just your favorite coffee house

The Online Writing Workshop for SF & Fantasy taught me how to write better by reviewing other writing, and the basics of both writing and reviewing are outlined in the five categories identified by the Workshop:

1) professionalism of writing
2) setting
3) characterization
4) plot credibility
5) dialogue

I've seen lots of blog posts out there on items 1, 3,4, and 5, but very little on setting. Is setting important just for SF & Fantasy, where you have a lot of world-building? I think setting is important no matter the genre. And maybe, just maybe, one of the things that sets apart a good book from a really, really good book is the attention the author gives to setting. To have a good book you need strong characters, excellent dialogue, a great plot, and crisp writing. But just based on the books I've been reading lately, what stands out between a good book versus a best-seller kind of book is (well, there are several things) but one of them is really interesting and well-drawn settings.

For instance, you could write a scene between two characters in conflict at a restaurant or a coffee house. Familiar setting, but a little ho-hum. Or, you could write it in a cemetery, at a fresh graveside. Or, they're at a greyhound racetrack. Or, a hospital emergency room. Picking unusual places can add a whole new layer to a scene. You see unusual or flashy settings all the time in movies (at the moment for some reason I'm thinking of that 80's classic, When Harry Met Sally - anyone remember the scene at the Sharper Image store?) (okay, that setting might have been a promo, but it's still memorable). Author Don Miller wrote a great blog post pointing out that many of our special memories are associated with unusual or out-of-the-way places, and gives advice about things we can do to create more memorable "scenes" in our own lives.

What's your favorite unusual setting from a movie or a book?

Writer's Web: blogging with voice

I don't have Obi-Wan Kenobi to teach me the way of the Force, but way of the blog I am slowly learning.

Here's a few things I learned from wandering the writers' web this past week:

1) We know we have to write our stories/novels with a strong voice. Check out stiryourtea.blogspot.com to see a strong voice that makes these daily blog posts fun to read. I betcha her strong voice is probably is the reason why this girl writer who is only 22 years old already has an agent for her book. Gasp.

2) Writers' blogs are *mostly* about writing, but I'm discovering the ones I enjoy the most mix in a lot of other fun stuff too. Like lisa-laura.blogspot.com - this team recently posted a list of things you wish you could tell your teenage self.

3) Blogfests. I keep seeing this term pop up and wondered what the heck it is - couldn't even google a definition. But by my superior deductive reasoning powers (ha!) I have determined they are someone's invitation to blog on a particular subject, you sign up with a link to your blog, and then everyone reads everyone else's post and comments. So I signed up for a blogfest at fictiongroupie.blogspot.com (for sharing snippets of dialogue). I was #47. I am not sure how I will find time to read 46 other blogs (no wait, by the time the blogfest starts in May there may be 100). What have I got myself into???

4) Blogs that have a bit of mixed media are very interesting. Okay we all know that adding photos or images to our blog does more than just add a bit of color. But some people have that extra creative touch, like the writer who also sketches at Suffering from Writer's Blog. It's not the quality of her sketches that garners attention, it's how she uses them to spice up her blog. Here is a fun example of how she combines her sketches with book cover art to do an amazing marketing job for the Fablehaven series.

5) The blogger at The Quintessentially Questionable Query Experiment has a fixation with alliteration, or possibly practiced Peter Piper too much when he was little. However, he has a good thing going because he gets writers to post their query letters and their agent's responses and that's some darn useful info.

What great web-sites have you discovered that you just can't resist sharing with me?

Analyzing the Luxe, by Anna Godbersen

What techniques of writing craft did this author use in this young adult novel?

A quick summary: the Luxe is a soap opera set in 1899, Manhattan. Elizabeth is in love with the stable boy, but has to marry a rich socialite to save her family. Her best friend has a dangerous crush on Elizabeth's fiance, and the fiance in turn has a crush on Elizabeth's younger sister. And if that wasn't twisted enough, Elizabeth's maid is also in love with the same stable boy.

As you can imagine from these entanglements, there is a lot of drama in this novel. It starts with an obituary - and we find out very quickly that Elizabeth's funeral is being on held on the day she was supposed to get married. By the fourth page, we discover that the coffin is empty, because Elizabeth's body was never found.

Aha! Immediately you suspect that she is still alive. This is so obvious I won't even mention a spoiler warning. However, it is an intriguing hook. That, and the rich writing style that matches the period without being old-fashioned, were the two things that encouraged me to continue reading.

Nothing really stands out on the first page of this book, but because it was preceded by an obituary, I kept reading. On the second page, this paragraph was so vivid I stopped and read it twice to savor it:

They were Liz's peers, the young men she had danced quadrilles with at countless balls. They had disappeared to St Paul's and Exeter at some point and then returned with grown-up ideas and a fierce will to flirt. And here they were now, in black frock coats and mourning bands, looking grave for perhaps the first time ever.

Descriptions like the one above, along with sumptuous settings at balls and attention to both historical and fashionable detail, make this a good read even if my stomach did turn rather sour at the devious plotting. While the author successfully paints the woes of high society and its class distinctions, snobbery, and resulting suffocation, she also subtly hints that good morals are just as suffocating.

But forgive me, this is supposed to be an analysis of writing craft, not moral content.

An interesting technique: each chapter (which heralds a shift in point of view), is preceded by some sort of quote, personal note, or invitation, which leads directly into the chapter. For instance, chapter 1 begins with a formal invitation to a ball, and the scene that follows is at the ball. Chapter 2 begins with a short note "Cloakroom, one o'clock. Bring cigges. - DH" and we soon discover that the note was written by Elizabeth's impetuous younger sister and then surreptitiously passed to a young man at the ball.

Here's another fun chapter intro: "This is to certify that I, William Sackhouse Schoonmaker, do leave all my worldly possessions, as itemized below, including all holdings relating to business, real estate, and personal property, to ______________." Who could resist not diving into the chapter, hoping to find out who will inherit the fortune?

Here are a couple interesting examples of character building, from my two favorite characters. First, the selfish, ambitious Penelope, Liz's supposed best friend:

"Little Bo Peep. That's too perfect for Liz," Penelope Hayes said, as she said nearly everything, with a quarter ounce of venom.

Another example:

Penelope gave a careless shrug. If he wanted to praise Elizabeth Holland, whom she had long ago singled out as her principal rival and thus her only possible best friend, and who was now circling the polo-field-sized dance floor with that toad Percival Coddington, it was fine with her.

Three examples of Liz's younger sister, Diana:

"What makes you think there is any comparison between me and the girls of my class?" Dianna pronounced the last two words in disgust. The girls of her class were slaves to rules, going about life - if you could call it that- like bloodless mannequins. "I told you I was looking for an artist," she went on impatiently. "So if you're going to go on thinking conventionally and just like everybody else, I may as well leave."

Diana took a mental note of the fade on the upholstery so that she could give her nightly diary entry a touch of ambiance.

She did not sit still the way she was supposed to, the way her sister did. She gesticulated and laughed and pouted and generally made the dress she was sewn into and the room she was inhabiting look ridiculous and constraining.

(Note: overuse of -ly adverbs in this novel. Found a couple sentences that even had TWO ly's in them! - where was the editor??? This is stuff they all rant about!)

In summary, notable writing craft in this novel is the use of clever quotes, invitations, notes, and excerpts from newspaper articles and wills to precede each chapter and make you curious to read more.



Here are some other novels that I've analyzed for writing craft. Next I'll be working on the Magic Thief, by Sarah Prineas (middle grade fantasy).

If you've read the Luxe, did anything about the writing stand out to you? Can you suggest another book with interesting examples of writing craft?